When Siblings Arrive: Preparing Your Child for a New Baby

Welcoming a new baby into the family is always a momentous occasion, full of excitement and NEW BEGINNINGS.

From imagining what your baby will be like to preparing the nursery, there’s so much to look forward to. However, amidst all the preparations for the newborn, it’s just as important to think about how your older child might be feeling and how best to support them during this big transition. Becoming an older sibling is a significant change, and your child may experience a mixture of emotions. While some may be excited, others might feel unsure, anxious or even jealous. With the right preparation and ongoing support, you can help your child embrace their new role and make the transition as smooth as possible.

The Importance of Early Preparation

It’s wise to begin preparing your child early on, well before the baby arrives. This gives them time to process the idea of becoming a sibling and to adjust to the changes ahead. Depending on your child’s age, this could mean explaining the concept of a new baby in simple terms, or using books and stories to help them better understand what to expect.

Talking About the Baby

Once your pregnancy becomes visible, it’s a good time to start conversations about the baby. The earlier you do this, the better your child will understand what’s happening. If they’re quite young, use age-appropriate language - for instance, “Mummy has a baby growing in her tummy, and soon we’ll get to meet them.” Older children may have more complex questions, so try to answer honestly, but in a way they can grasp.
To make the idea of a new sibling more tangible, consider reading books together on the topic. There are many wonderful children’s books about becoming an older sibling. Stories such as I’m a Big Brother by Joanna Cole or The New Baby by Mercer Mayer can help your child visualise the situation and understand their own emotions better.

Creating Excitement and Involvement

The arrival of a new baby doesn’t have to feel like a disruption for your older child. Involving them in preparations can help them feel like a valued part of the process and build a positive connection with the baby before they even arrive. Let them help choose clothes or toys for the baby. Even small decisions - like picking out a soft blanket or a hat - can help them feel included. Decorating the nursery together is another lovely way to build anticipation while giving them a sense of ownership.
This is also a good chance to discuss what life might be like once the baby arrives - for example, that the baby may need more attention at first, but there will still be plenty of special moments for your older child too. A thoughtful idea is to help your child prepare a gift for the new baby - a soft toy, a drawing, or a card. This can help establish a positive association and reinforce their identity as a big brother or sister who is loving and helpful.

Understanding and Acknowledging Their Feelings

It’s entirely normal for children to have a mix of emotions when they learn they’ll have a sibling. These can range from excitement and curiosity to jealousy and fear. Create a space where your child feels safe expressing their thoughts and feelings.
They might worry about changes to their routine, or fear that they’ll lose your attention. Reassure them that although life will be different, your love for them remains the same. Explain that babies need a lot of care early on, but it won’t always be that way.
Extra patience is important during this time. If your child becomes clingy, acts out, or regresses (for example, asking for a bottle or wetting the bed), try to respond with empathy and kindness. Let them know that their feelings are valid and they’re still just as loved.

Keep Consistent Routines

Children thrive on routine, and maintaining familiar patterns offers them a sense of stability. While a new baby will inevitably shake things up, keeping to your older child’s usual schedule as much as possible can help them feel secure.
Try to stick to regular meal times, naps, and bedtimes. If adjustments are needed, explain these changes gently and be consistent. That predictability will help them feel more in control and reassured during this transitional period.

One-on-One Time with Your Child

With a newborn demanding your attention, it’s easy for your older child to feel overlooked. Make an effort to spend one-on-one time with them each day, even if it’s only for a few minutes. This reminds them that they’re still a priority in your life.
It doesn’t need to be anything extravagant - a cuddle, reading a favourite story, or a short play session can go a long way. The key is to make them feel seen, valued, and loved.

Helping Siblings Bond

After the baby arrives, continue nurturing the bond between your older child and the new sibling. Introduce them gently, and if your child is comfortable, let them hold or touch the baby under your supervision. Encourage them to help with simple tasks, like fetching a nappy or choosing an outfit.
Praise their efforts and show appreciation when they show kindness or curiosity towards the baby. Positive reinforcement helps build confidence in their new role and encourages a healthy sibling relationship.
Try to avoid comparisons or favouritism. Instead, focus on celebrating your older child’s helpfulness and highlighting the special role they play in the family.

Managing Expectations and Staying Flexible

Every child reacts differently to becoming a sibling. Some will embrace their new role enthusiastically, while others may need more time. Be prepared for ups and downs and keep communication open.
If things don’t go according to plan, don’t be too hard on yourself. Some children take time to adjust, and that’s perfectly okay. What matters most is that they continue to feel loved, valued, and supported. With patience, they’ll grow into their role and develop a beautiful bond with their new sibling.

The arrival of a new baby is a life-changing event for the entire family. While it can bring challenges, it also presents a wonderful opportunity to grow closer and create new family dynamics. Through early preparation, open conversations and lots of love, you can help your older child welcome their new sibling with pride and joy.
Remember, the transition may take time, and that’s absolutely normal. By being patient and understanding, you’re laying the foundation for a strong, loving relationship between your children - one that will bring countless heart-warming moments in the years to come.